Monday, 21 December 2009

Wow Time Flies

Hello,
Thought I better get in here and type something. No particular reason a heads up a look forward.

Well life dealt me some blows I battled with my health in a way still am but won't let it beat me.

I battled with work we battled we came to a compromise, I have since moved on from there and I have to say the not going to working there has done me a huge favour and I am much more positive, less scared of things that could happen and a whole lot less stressed.

I decided to get a grip on things, I had let being ill rule me, should it nope so I kicked some ass and decided to get a lil grasp back on life. I got a new job, I moved back to my home town and have met up again with some awesome old friends.

I have a beautiful nephew who the first time I held I looked into his eyes and thought yes life has its curveballs but wow, this little man needs his aunty around.

Relationships, youknow them serious ones, I dunno, I cant pretend all the stuff that happened didn't happen I wish I could cause maybe then I would have some trust in men, be a little more confident and not just feel that I am being used or somethings going to go wrong.

Its odd that someone is trying hard to crack the outer shell at the moment, will I let them in I don't know, not the first time this person has tried, do I let them in, do I risk all the hurt that could come from it. Truth be known by confidence is rock bottom at the moment all I think is this person wants to hurt me I let them in they going to hurt me. I hate myself and that really doesn't help I need to love me before I let anyone else in I suppose.

This Christmas is going to be very different I am going to be somewhere I can't help smiling and thats with my bro, sis in law and nephew. Here's hoping December sees a close on the past 18 months and a refreshing January.

Peace, hugs and well wishes
me
x

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